Prayer 101: Silence & Solitude, Part 2

Practicing the disciplines of Silence and Solitude takes effort. Being silent and in solitude are not natural for many of us. 

The busyness and noise of the early twenty-first century should actually bea clarion call to find some place of peace and tranquility. All of us are almost continually surrounded by people and their chatter (either live or via television, radio or internet), full schedules of meetings and appointments (whether it's our personal or professional lives, not to mention our kids, spouses, significant others), and a society that is screaming for attention.

It's so noisy and crowded that we often find it close to impossible to discover rest and peace. Silence and solitude are elusive friends.

Yet this is exactly where God wants us to go. He wants to meet with us. Corporately - as in a church or group worship session - is fine, but I  believe God really (and I think preferably) wants to meet with us on an individual basis. We remember that God is a personal God; He is relational in Nature. All of us should know that building a personal relationship with someone takes one-on-one time; two people meeting together, usually alone, with minimal distractions. Just think back on how you met your spouse or the great times spent with a son or daughter;  it was a time of being one-on-one.

As we looked at a particular time in the life and ministry of the prophet Elijah in 1 Kings 18 and 19, in part 1,  we noticed and examined the prophet's silence before God. Scripture presents to us the assumption of Elijah's silence. Any prophet worth his salt is silent before God; he just knows better that when God speaks,  we are to be silent.

But just as important as silence, the idea and practice of solitude are absolutely necessary in developing a meaningful and vibrant prayer life. In order to meet well with God, we have to get alone with Him. We have to separate ourselves from the rest of the world. We have to separate ourselves from our job, and our responsibilities. I would go on to further say that it is even necessary to get away from our spouses, children, and friends for regular intervals to be with God.

Going back to 1 Kings 19, we see Elijah running from where God had used him.  He ran to the wilderness. He was alone. In his solitude, God provided for his physical needs of rest, nourishment, and refreshment. Elijah separated himself from everything that was at war with him. 

Even ministry can be "at war" with us if it is interfering with our personal relationship with God. 

So  Elijah took a time out from what he was "called to do" to do  what he was called to do - have a personal relationship with God - and perhaps more importantly, he sought solitude to "be what or who he was called to BE" - a child of God first, then a prophet.

Let me give you a personal example. As a  small business owner, I can close my office door, screen calls and shoo people away from me so I can be alone and think.  For typical day-to-day stuff, that often works. But sometimes, drastic measures are needed. The "alone-ness" of my office MUST be traded for the solitude of my car or the local beach. I have to get away from everything that is in some way connected to me. I will shut off my cell phone, turn off the radio, look for a spot that is far and away from anyone and everyone just to get away - and be quiet.

My trusted manager knows that when I abruptly leave the office with pen, paper, and Bible in hand and a frustrated look on my face, I'll be back and that I'm out seeking supernatural guidance. Sometimes I don't even know where I'm headed (like Elijah), but I just go.

The pen and paper? Those are to first write down my frustrations or worries and to actually hold them up to God; to give those things to Him who is better able to deal with them than I am. Once I have that off my chest and mind, I can enter into this time of solitude. Sometimes it's for an hour, sometimes it lasts longer.

Whatever time God needs to be with me, I am willing to spend. God is taking care of my business and whatever is swirling around there (by the way, I do encourage my manager to do the same when needed).

If I  want to truly hear God and listen to what He is trying to tell me, I  must get alone with Him and be quiet. It's only then that I can return to my office and face down the giants that are looking to defeat me. The best part is that God gets the glory and I can enjoy that victory.

Even Jesus demonstrated this practice. According to Mark 1:35, "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the  house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed."  And in Matthew 16:4, "Jesus left them and went away." And how about John 12:36, "When he had finished speaking, Jesus left and hid Himself from them."

We haven't even looked at Jesus' most "famous" time of solitude when He spent 40 days fasting alone in the desert; Matthew 4:2, Mark 1:12,13,  Luke 4:1,2. 

Jesus "needed" this time of solitude to be alone with His Father so that He could properly meet and dispose of Satan's temptations and then return to the ministry that He came to accomplish. It was going to be a long, hard three-year road.

I think we can rightly assume that Jesus spent extraordinary amounts of time alone and in prayer with God the Father. These were Jesus' times to "BE" with God.

If Jesus needed to practice Silence and Solitude before God, then we need to practice it as well. This is a retreat to be replenished and refreshed. I try to do it as often as I can. An hour here or there. When possible, a longer chunk of time. 

We Christians sometimes refer to going into or having or creating a "Prayer Closet". In Matthew 6:6, Jesus tells His disciples, "But when you pray, go into your room [closet, KJV; inner room, NASB; etc],  close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your  Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." Whatever you want to call it, it is a small or at least private place. It is a place of solitude - and maybe even sanctuary.

We think of that prayer closet as a closet or special room in which to pray. But I believe that a prayer closet is maybe a little bit more than that. The idea of a closet invokes visions of a sealed, dark, small space. We store things inside of it. Some of those things are private; we don't allow others to see them and possibly we don't allow other people to even know we have or own those things. As well as keeping things IN for storage, closets keep things OUT for the contents' "protection". Our prayer closet needs to be a "safe" place to meet with God.

Here's a practical idea for you. I did this for the first time about 15 years or so ago. It is a marvelous exercise. But it must be planned for. 

Plan and take a day off - that means 6 to 8 hours - to get alone and BE with God. Some of you may not be able to do this at the spur of the moment, so plan it out. Being prepared for a Day of Silence and Solitude is an awesome thing; God is meeting with you. 

1. Take out your calendar. Choose a day and put a stake in it. Nothing is to interfere with it.  This is Holy time. Be sure to tell those close to you; your spouse,  staff, anyone who may need to get in contact with you. This is to be YOUR time alone and quiet with God your Father.

2. Choose a place that is somewhat convenient for you, but also away from the normal distractions of life. Be sure to find or have a place that has a bathroom close by. If you can't find a neutral place, you may want to ask your pastor if there's a room in your church that you can use for private prayer for a part of a day. When you go, be sure to put a note on the outside of the door so that no one disturbs you. If that's not practical, consider taking or using a "sick" or "personal" day from work that you can spend alone at home. The only problem with being home is that the distractions of cleaning, tidying up, potential neighbors, etc, can interrupt your time. Be sure to turn off the phone and maybe even disconnect the doorbell. This is your time to be alone and quiet with God.

3. Prepare to be alone with God. If you've never done this Silence and Solitude exercise, you need to prepare for it. Preparing to be alone with God isn't just steps 1 and 2  above. Preparing to be alone with God requires a few intervals of quiet prayer ahead of time. Spend time in God's Word. Keep a pencil and paper handy to jot down stray thoughts that invade your mind. Oftentimes,  these are signals of what you need to be talking to God about. When you go for your day of Silence and Solitude, be sure to take these notes with you.

4. Come prepared. Bring your notes. Bring your Bible. Bring a box of tissues; and a plastic bag to put the used ones in. Bring a light snack and a couple of bottles of water. Be sure to have a normal breakfast before you begin.  Ask a close friend or two to pray for your time alone; not only before, but during.

5. Be prepared to be silent. The first 20 to 30 minutes will seem intimidating. As I mentioned in Part 1, most of us can't bear silence for more than about 15 seconds let alone your first half hour. It will be hard, but you'll be able to do it.

6. Put yourself in a position of Silence and Solitude. Open your Bible, put your notes in front of you as an offering to God, and be still. Your time in Silence and Solitude may start with some quiet,  personal worship. You're alone, so don't be ashamed to lift your hands!  There's no "particular" position of prayer to be in. At times you may  feel uncomfortable or impatient or frustrated. Walk around the room a  little bit as you speak to God in silent thought and prayer. Take brief  notes of what God is telling you. Pray them back to Him for understanding and clarification. Take some time to refresh yourself with  water and a light snack; God has provided for you.

7. When you're finished. When you're finished... Trust me, you'll know when God says this time is complete - for now. But don't fall for the lie of the evil one after  29 minutes! This is your day to be alone with God. If you're driving back to your home, leave the radio, music, or phone off. You need to debrief yourself. You need to think about this Holy time. Will you have all the answers you were initially seeking? Most likely no. But God will have begun a process. Be sure to contact those who have been praying for you. All that you need to do is thank them for praying. You don't need to go into details of what your day was like; this is an incredibly private matter. That person or those people had a direct effect on your time spent alone with God.

As  much as you may want this time to continue forever, you have to get back  to the life that God called you to lead. Our Father has put each of us  in particular places and times to be a part of His Will and His Design  and His Plan. Our job is to be on the battlefield with God as our Banner.

I encourage you to find and make time for a Day of Silence and Solitude. God wants to bless your life by being with Him.

Heavenly  Father, I lift up and pray for each one who desires to be with you.  Help us to carve out significant times to be alone and quiet with you.  Help us to enjoy Silence and Solitude with you as You work in and through our lives. You alone are gracious and Holy. You alone deserve our praise and prayer and worship. You alone are God. Amen.