Prayer 101: 4. Honesty in prayer

Remember what your mom always told you, "Honesty is the best policy?" Well, she was right!

When we're young and impressionable, we are honest. Children are honest with their thoughts, words, and actions. Children are emotionally and intellectually honest about their feelings and observations; sometimes to the point of embarrassment to their parents! Children, by and large, are without guile.

Honesty requires humility. Humility in itself can be self-embarrassing in that we have to show ourselves as we are. Humility requires a certain  "nakedness" of thought and being. Children, in their innocence, are more humble and honest than we adults. Jesus calls attention to this fact when He says, "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the Kingdom of God.  Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in  the Kingdom of Heaven." Matthew 18:3-4. 

In his book, "Heaven is for Real", Todd Burpo writing about his son's near-death experience, helps to define "child-like" humility. He writes, "It's not the lack of intelligence, but the lack of guile. The lack of an agenda. It's that precious, fleeting time before we have accumulated enough pride or position to care what other people might think. The same un-selfish honesty that enables a three-year-old to splash joyfully in a  rain puddle, or tumble laughing in the grass with a puppy, or point out loudly that you have a booger hanging out of your nose, is what is required to enter heaven. It's the opposite of ignorance - it is intellectual honesty: to be willing to accept reality and call things  what they are even when it is hard." That's a great definition.

That is, I believe, how we are to approach God. In child-like humility, without guile. We are to approach God honestly. I would go further to say that honesty is not for His sake, but for ours.

As Daniel prayed his great prayer in Daniel 9:4-19, he was honest. He was honest in acknowledging God for Who He is; Creator and Sovereign over all. Daniel acknowledged himself and the Jewish people for who they were and are through confession (we'll concentrate on that in the next lesson); disobedient people who got what they deserved. 

Throughout his prayer, Daniel shines the light on both God's marvelous attributes of righteousness, faithfulness, mercy, and justice as well as the people's disobedience, unfaithfulness, and even wickedness. Daniel did not try to sugarcoat or whitewash who he was. He did not try to clothe himself with gaudy self-righteousness. Daniel was honest; honest intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. In today's vernacular: you can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig.

As Daniel read through the Scriptures over his life he was mentored by other men and women of faith who were honest with God. He saw that God honored that child-like honesty and humility as He bent His ear to hear and respond.

As I've already mentioned, this honesty is not for God's sake, but for our own. Let's be... honest; God knows us. I mean He really knows us. God saw us as individuals in the womb, "For you created my inmost being;  you knit me together in my mother’s womb." Psalm 139:13. He knows the number of hairs on our head, "And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered." Matthew 10:30. God knows our going out and coming in, "You discern my going out and my lying down;  you are familiar with all my ways." Psalm 139:3 . He knows every aspect of our lives and of our thoughts, "The LORD knows the thoughts of man;"  Psalm 94:11. 

And so, as we come before the Throne of Grace, we are to be honest with all aspects of our needs - physical, emotional, spiritual. We are (I am) to bare it all. It's not just for the catharsis of the moment, but it's the honesty of the words, emotions, and needs. God doesn't want us to hide anything from Him. Why? I can tell you from my own experience with God,  that when I am finally honest when I finally lay it all out for Him,  He graciously shows me and can speak to me in a way that I'll understand.

Thankfully, Scripture is a good way to practice honesty in prayer with God. The  Holy Spirit provides the Words we need especially in those times when we don't have the words or maybe feel ashamed to utter those words. In the latter case, we remember that we are speaking God's Word.

Before we go on, we have to remember something about words in general, and it's this: Words are, I  believe, the second most powerful force in the entire universe, behind God's Will. From the very beginning of the  Bible, we see God creating all that we see in the universe by His spoken  Word - whether these things are seen - stars, planets, animals, etc - or unseen - the building blocks of life or even light. Each of those was spoken into existence. Jesus Himself is the Word of God. At Jesus' Words,  the sea is stilled, the winds are calmed and Satan is silenced. With words, people throughout the Bible are healed and the dead are raised to life. By the prayers of God's people, He responds and saves them from bondage in Egypt or routs the various enemies of the Israelites.

Words can be used to create and destroy. We can bless a friend or stranger with words of praise or encouragement or we can damage (sometimes permanently) the self-worth of a loved one. Words, whether creative or destructive - and oftentimes more than actions - can sit and fester in the mind for years; even a lifetime.

So when we need to pray about a certain circumstance or emotion or feeling and we don't know which words to use, Scripture provides them.

Honest Words from God for when we're dealing with life's circumstances. Life can be rough. People - especially our "enemies" - may not show us mercy. We pray for relief.

"But when I was silent and still,
   not even saying anything good, my anguish increased.
My heart grew hot within me,
   and as I meditated, the fire burned;
   then I spoke with my tongue: 'Show me, O LORD, my life’s end
   and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life.
You have made my days a mere hand breadth;
   the span of my years is as nothing before you.
   Each man’s life is but a breath.

"But now, Lord, what do I look for?
   My hope is in you.
Save me from all my transgressions; do not make me the scorn of fools." Psalm 39: 2-5, 7-8.

"Men open their mouths to jeer at me;
   they strike my cheek in scorn and unite together against me.
God has turned me over to evil men
   and thrown me into the clutches of the wicked.
All was well with me, but he shattered me;
   he seized me by the neck and crushed me. 

"Even now my witness is in heaven; my advocate is on high.
My intercessor is my friend as my eyes pour out tears to God;
on behalf of a man he pleads with God as a man pleads for his friend." Job 16:10-12, 19-21.

"My days have passed, my plans are shattered, and so are the desires of my heart." Job 17:11

"Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, 'Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from  harm  so that I will be free from pain.' And God granted his request." 1 Chronicles 4:10.

God provides the Words when our circumstances are, let's just say, not what we expected. He hears our cry. He listens to our moans. He provides the words.

God provides His Words when our emotions are raw and suffering. Emotions are real. God doesn't want us to suppress them, but to rejoice in them. We are emotional beings because we are created in God's Image, and God is an emotional God. The most powerful emotions we experience are sadness, anger, fear, and joy. These emotions affect our clarity of thought and action. As we are honest in talking and praying to God, He is able to provide the clarity and relief we need.

"As the deer pants for streams of water,
   so my soul pants for you, O God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
   When can I go and meet with God?
My tears have been my food day and night,
while men say to me all day long, 'Where is your God?'  

"These things I remember as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go with the multitude, leading the procession to the house of God,
with shouts of joy and thanksgiving among the festive throng. 

"Why are you downcast, O my soul?
   Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.
My soul is downcast within me;
   therefore I will remember you" Psalm 42:1-6.

"He has broken my teeth with gravel; he has trampled me in the dust.
I have been deprived of peace;
   I have forgotten what prosperity is.
So I say, 'My splendor is gone and all that I had hoped from the LORD.' 

"I remember my affliction and my wandering, the bitterness and the gall.
I well remember them, and my soul is downcast within me.
Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope:

"Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, 'The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.'

"The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him;
 it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.
It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young." Lamentations 3:16-27

"I  thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of  Christ Jesus. 

"It is right for me to feel this way about all of you since I have you in my heart; for whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God’s grace with me. God can testify how I  long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus.

"And  this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge  and depth of insight so that you may be able to discern what is best  and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the  fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and  praise of God." Philippians 1:3-11.

We are so incredibly blessed to have people like David and Job and Paul and Jeremiah (he wasn't known as the weeping prophet for nothing!), and Daniel, who demonstrate honesty in prayer. They wrestled, like Jacob, with God but instead used words and emotions. They came boldly before the throne of  grace seeking mercy and justice and sometimes, even answers. They came with "child-like" faith and humility that God demands. There was no guile; no agenda. They spoke what was on their hearts and minds. They were not ashamed, to be honest.

Nor should we.

My God in heaven, thank you for listening to my pleas when I am hurt. Thank you for giving me words when my soul so aches that I utter only groans and shed tears. Thank you for words of joy and blessing, a simple  "Hallelujah!" that gladdens my heart. I love you, God. I know You love me even more. Remind me when I'm not being honest with You so that my joy can become complete when we come together. Amen. Amen.